I was super excited about the start of NaNoWriMo. I really was. Then I had some health issues flare up. I’m doing much better right now, but my writing has certainly taken a hit. I know it’s only seven days into National Novel Writing Month and I still have time, but somehow not feeling good seems to have just sucked up all my creativity and left me with a blank mind.
All the words I’ve gotten in over the last few days, which isn’t very many, are so incredibly boring I could scream. I write a scene and then sit back in disbelief and ask myself who in the world cares?? I just sit there with my fingers hovering over the keyboard and the story that I thought I had is unraveling before my eyes and has left me with nothing.
Seven days in and I have two options. Keep at it and write every boring word in the hope that at some point something will spark, or at least in the end I will have something I can work with, OR I can switch streams altogether and reach for another idea. I’m leaning toward muddling through no matter how slow it is in the hopes of remembering why I wanted to write this story in the first place. Who knows – maybe this is one of those ideas that just isn’t going to pan out. I won’t know unless i try to see it through to the end. But it’s not a good sign when I’m boring myself to sleep.
Maybe when things settle down and some of the stress goes away I’ll find my pace again. With my daughter’s trip to the emergency room in October (and me holding my breath to see what the ambulance and ER bills were going to come out to), and now all the time I’ve spent in doctor’s offices over the last two weeks, among a few other things that have me all uptight, well….that can stifle one’s creativity I’m sure. I know one thing. I’m not giving up. I can do this. If I write 50,000 unoriginal, boring, and monotonous words, well, I’ve still accomplished the task of writing every single day and getting the words on paper. They may be unfit for human consumption, but they will be written.
I’m off to look at my story and decide whether to keep at this one or dive into something new.